Thursday, October 20, 2011

Parenting License? No.

Do we really want to be like China, guys? I don't think so. Recently I watched a YouTube rant by Kicesie (I won't dare embed the video, as she is known for descending on bloggers who do with threats of legal action) saying that people should have to have a license to become a parent. I disagree with this on so many levels! First of all, I probably wouldn't have been given a license to have my daughter. She was unplanned, but definitely not unwanted! I wasn't married when I got pregnant with her. I was married months before I gave birth, but if we had lived in a place where people had to have licenses to give birth, there is a good chance she would have been forcefully ripped from me, and I would not have my beautiful baby in my arms right now. You may think I'm exaggerating. Maybe, maybe not. But I think that it is a slippery slope when a government is allowed to decide who should and should not have children. Just look at Nazi Germany. Or China today. Secondly, some of the people that the majority think "shouldn't be allowed" to have kids are some of the best parents. I have an acquaintance who got pregnant at 17. She gave birth at 18 and is now one of the most loving, fiercely protective mothers I've ever met. She is married now and pregnant with her second baby. One of my best friends wasn't a teen mom, but her first child was born out of wedlock. Did this make her a bad mother? NO! She and her boyfriend eventually got married and had another baby, but she was a loving mother even as a single mom. Then there is the income issue. I grew up with children in poverty. Sometimes their lights were shut off for a few days. Sometimes they couldn't pay their activity fees on time. Sometimes their parents struggled to have dinner on the table every night. But you know what? Some of their parents were the kindest people and the children grew up in loving families. That is more than I can say for some of the children of the older, elitist parents in the city I live in who have children only to carry on their name, or because they want someone to mold into a younger version of themselves. I went to college with a girl who nannied for a family like this, and she said that the mother was constantly at an event of some kind, or working out rather than spending time with her children, but always made sure they were stylishly dressed before they left the house! Wow, way to show your children what's most important. Anyway, I digress. Love is what is important in a family, not being an older parent or having a six figure income. Children from working class families quite often grow up to be strong, hardworking, well-adjusted people. I know many adults who prove that, including some of those closest to me! Lastly, most people who don't want children these days don't have them. It has become more acceptable to not have children, so many people don't! I'm not a supporter of abortion, but I do support birth control. If you feel you would be a terrible parent, you don't have to make any babies! Quite simple. There are of course other things to think about, like race quotas, which I could write a whole blog on, and what the terms of such a license would be. If the person giving the licenses disagreed with your religion or political ideology, would they refuse to issue one to you? What if you were disabled but still able to raise a child? Would your past mistakes haunt you? If you'd spent time in a treatment facility as a teen would it affect your chances of getting a parenting license? Would your entire life's history be under scrutiny? Would your facebook posts be used against you? All things to think about. In conclusion, having to have a license to become a parent would prevent some very capable people from having children. I wonder if Kicesie thinks she would be allowed to obtain a parenting license?Some more things to consider:In China, there is a parenting license. Women who have become pregnant out of wedlock have been given forced abortions, something no one should EVER have to go through! Women who have had one child (or two in rural areas) who become pregnant again have been given forced abortions.Women who have one child already are sometimes forcefully sterilized.This is all behind the idea that only certain kinds of people should become parents, and people should only have certain sizes of families.I believe that all people who want children should have the chance to have their own. I believe that good families can come in all sizes. Read more about China's policies on children, and the testimonies of Chinese women here: never, ever want America to be like this.